Loving You Like An Hourglass.

Loving you is like loving the sand in an hourglass

Silky smooth yet coarse as you pass through my fingers.

It’s like catching raindrops in your hands

for every bit you catch, so much more is slipping past.

We had a past.

A pretty good one too,

Yet I must be an hourglass

As I can feel you slipping through,

Your body running over mine

I guess we used up all our time..

I wonder if I’m still on your mind?

You’re on mine..

Every time I close my eyes I feel the touch of your lips, your mouth on my neck, your hips on my hips.

But then they open and I’m alone again, on my own again.

Looking at you through a pane of glass I can see that you’re happy.

Or you seem happy.

Either way I’m happy you’re happy or seem happy cause honestly as long as you’re happy it’s fine that I’m not.

You found friends and a direction

While I payed to get lost.

I disappeared into a sea of bodies and alcohol and way too hyped DJs

I did this on replay

Over

And over

And over again.

And while I’m getting better at hiding the pain

I can’t seem to stop meeting new people with your name.

I’m not sure if this is a sign that I’m supposed to forget you

I mean I’m certainly glad I met you

But now I need you to let me go,

For the final time

I loved you

Now it’s time for me to go.

.

.

.

C.C.

Finding Supplementary Forms Of Income.

The number one form I can currently recommend is Fiverr. It’s a simple site that started out with the premise of you could pay someone $5 and they’d do whatever for you, be it write a resume, voiceovers, breakup with your significant other through video, literally anything really. These days it’s grown to have a wide range of prices but with my code you can get 20% off if you decide to get something. Even if you don’t i’d recommend signing up, it’s super easy for generating revenue. http://www.fiverr.com/s2/05fd98ad60

Start a blog! It’ll take time and dedication but over time you’ll grow a following. Once you have that you can start using your blog to sell your own products, work for various brands as an influencer if you wish, or even turn it into a book. Honestly the possibilities while not endless are indeed numerous. I mean you can run ads on your blog but honestly they don’t generate much income at all unless you have an insane amount of followers and honestly at that point it would be much more profitable to just sell something yourself.

Set up a GoFundMe account or some other equivalent like Patreon! With patreon you can create different tiers of rewards that people can get by donating money to you. For some people with large following even a simple shout out in a video for $2 could be a tier with the more expensive ones being something like a personal video chat with the person for $50 (or really whatever prices they wish to make the different tiers.) A lot of YouTubers use this as a way to fund their videos allowing them to buy better equipment or travel around the world making vlogs about different interestings locations!

You could always become a sugar baby, I mean that’s not really my thing but I can get behind the mentality of having all your needs being met in exchange for companionship. Also who knows, maybe they’ll leave you something in their will in memory of time spent together.

Become a YouTuber! Honestly this is an extremely lucrative field right now if you can manage to stand out from the crowd, consistently upload, and steadily work to build a good subscriber amount. YouTubers have tons of chances to make money from monetizing their videos, doing product placement, playing ads before their videos, and the list goes on and on. Sometimes they even go on to use what they learned from youtube to create movies or web series, maybe break into the acting business. Honestly if you have the time, desire, honesty, and equipment to become a YouTuber I say go for it! Even if you don’t become famous you’ll learn some neat skills with editing and filming and who knows, maybe one day something will come from it all.

If you’re a super fast typer unlike me, than I would recommend transcribing. There are always available job posts for it that only require an internet connection to complete. Just listen to what’s being said and type it down as quickly as you can, if you really want to invest in this than get yourself a medical transcription license. Due to all of the complex medical jargon they have a much higher pay rate than regular transcribing jobs, although if you can speak multiple languages you could transcribe other languages into english which is also a higher paying type of transcribing.

Ever wonder who takes all of those stock photo pictures? Well nowadays there are multiple sites and apps that you can use to sell pictures you’ve taken as stock footage. They don’t pay you a huge amount but if you’re constantly bringing in quality of different varieties than this can quickly become a wonderful little side hustle. Some sites will take raw unedited photos so if you can’t edit, no worries, you’re fine. You can still sell photos!

There are a few other ways I can think of off the top of my head but I think i’ll save that for another post. I was thinking of maybe turning these supplementary income posts as a bit of a series, these days there are countless avenues out there. You just need to actually be aware that they exist and are actually valid options for generating income, sometimes we think ‘oh there’s no way to make money doing that’ but with such a large amount of consumers out there these days, there’s almost always a way to make money off of somehing.

On a side note what do you guys think about podcasts? I recently became aware that wordpress has a function which allows you to post podcasts to your site along with simultaneously posting them over on Apple Podcasts and the Google Play Store among other podcast hosting sites. I’m not entirely sure what I would discuss on there but the appeal is strong, i’m thinking maybe twenty minute podcasts around once a week for a posting schedule as that could give me time to brainstorm what to talk about. But who knows? I’m also considering starting out on YouTube myself but once again I need to consider content, I mean odds are most of it will be rather similar in nature to my blog but that’ll just make it even harder not to wind up repeating topics. Although I guess if they’re all on separate platforms it could be fine? Anyways those are thoughts for another time, as of right now it’s time for me to wish you all peace, love, and tranquil vibes!

C.C.

Inspiration Is Nourishment For Your Soul.

So today’s post is going to be about a few different sources of inspiration for me. Each of the people i’m going to talk about have helped me along on my spiritual journey and even with realizing new goals and directions with where I want to go in this life. I feel we can always stand to learn something from others, we even subconsciously desire to do so! Hence why we’re always asking what’s up or crawling through people’s social media; we’re trying to learn things about each other but really that’s just the desire to learn things FROM each other in a different skin.

We evolved as a community and now we’re all so divided, no one want to learn things anymore they just wish to get school over with, get a job, and video game their life away in their spare time, or spend it all watching whatever pops up on the tv. I don’t understand living like that. I mean I know statistically the odds of that being someone’s goal life are pretty high considering how many humans there are but I don’t want that nine to five, cubicle life-style. It’s just not for me, I don’t want to shrivel away in the same places, day after day, repetitive task after task. I need the wind in my hair, a pen/laptop/camera/phone in my hand, some sort of connection to the earth, new foods, new people, and new locations. I want to wander for a while, just start moving for a while before I get too rooted.

Anyways, onto the inspirational people!

Danny *Moon Hawk* is an absolute blessing. For those of you who don’t know he makes Vlogs and Music along with the occasional live stream. Sometimes he’ll post medicine music, original music, or crazy travel vlogs but no matter the content they’re always wonderful to watch. Even his vlogs of Envision festival make it look so peaceful and tranquil, he just manages to give off this warm vibe somehow. Highly recommend checking him and his content out; You can support him by following his Instagram, subscribing on YouTube, and if you want to help fund future endeavours he’s even on Patreon. Patreon has exclusive content of his and you can do as little as a single dollar a month as every little bit helps! If you can’t afford it than no worries, but show this wonderful human some love!

Dakota Wint is also amazing, him and Danny team up sometimes and their dynamic is great. Dakota is an incredibly inspirational travel vlogger, poet, writer with a huge following on YouTube as well as a clothing brand named Stay Happy Stay Weird. He recently branched over to doing podcasts with the series being called A Place For Humans, highly recommend giving them a listen or at least checking out his various medias. There’s all sorts of good stuff to be found there including entertainment, chill vibes, spiritual teaching, community, just highly, highly recommend checking him out and showing him some love. You won’t regret it, especially if you’re a fan of Koi Fresco (Vishuddha Das) or Jason VeeOneEye, and you’ll definitely love him if you enjoy Danny’s content.

If you’ve never heard of Vishuddha Das (Koi Fresco) and you’re really into spirituality or Carl Sagan than I would recommend heading over to KoisCorner on YouTube for an amazing spiritual education vlogger as well as an author. Honestly even his social media is just such a great motivator and source of inspiration. He’ll be dropping bit of knowledge there on the daily and he has a pretty interesting life story that he focuses on in his book A (Not) So Enlightened Youth. His other book is called The Meditation Manual and in fact, Koi is hosting a meditation retreat in the next few months over in India which looks like an amazing experience!

I mainly just wanted to talk about those three today but i’ll give an honorable mention to Jungle Man Sam, Infinite Waters, Matthew Silver, and AshSayer. Oh and if you need any or just enjoy them than check out HairWrapsByAsh on instagram, she has a little shop set up and does wonderful work.

Who are some of the people that inspire your life? If you can’t think of any than start searching out inspiration, it’s such a wonderful motivator and source of positivity in this life! Listen to their advice, figure out how they got where they are today, and most importantly..

Keep spreading the peace, love, and tranquil vibes all,

C.C.

Shadows

Shadows creeping, world quieting, daily fire becomes snuffed out.

Silence growing, stillness surrounding, even a whisper becomes a shout.

This is my favourite time of day,

When peoples masks shed and the truth comes out to play.

There’s a certain tranquility in that frozen world the comes after day,

If we could remain anywhere, that’s where I’d stay.

Warm breeze blowing, gentle as a lovers touch, that warm windy caress, I love it so much.

There’s a perfect solitude that lasts for so long, it’s quick but eternal, yet suddenly gone.

The moment passes as the sky meets the sea, from that smooth tranquil hold, the world is set free.

This was a short one but it’s about my favourite time of day, it’s the most beautiful time in the world. Everything is still and silently beautiful, I love it.

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes,

C.C.

Drunk

You, spitting rain

Gap toothed grin

Arms still, mind shaking

Parched brain, glass breaking

Drunk.

That’s what you are, isn’t it?

Sloshed, sullied, inebriated, walking through an earthquake

‘No I’m fine’ he says as he trips down the hall.

Too pushy, arms wandering, eyes rolling, overconfident, there’s no way this teenage tower could fall, Drunk.

Less than honourable, girl passed out, wasted opportunity, just can’t pass by,

Hunk. That’s what you are isn’t it? Any girl should feel lucky to have you, that’s what she’ll say once you’re through,

Drunk.

Hazy memories, silk smooth skin, no resistance, glides on in,

We were both drunk.

So that makes it okay right?

It’s no issue because there wasn’t a fight right?

As if the mere lack of aggression excuses your action and means that she’s totally cool, and 100 per cent, down with it.

Drunk.

Pushed back, broken screaming, weight of a thousand actions, drips down your neck.

Girl shouting, dick shrinking, sobered up, prick now finally thinking,

Drunk.

As if any amount of liquor changes the weight of your actions.

Pain blossoms around your back, shins, face, actions that cannot erase, the damage you have done to this poor little girl.

Budding flower, chopped off, quickly wilting, barely thinking, just one word, why?

Why? Why? Why?

He was so normal, just another drunk guy, confusion, anger, hurt, breaks down just to cry, why?

Now I hear that he’s getting off since he’s on the hockey team and they’re expected to go pro.

He never finished getting off so there’s no harm in letting him go.

No one cares about that little girl

Who can’t even go outside without wanting to hurl, dirty.

She rubs herself thin, rapidly removing painted skin, can’t even look at a guy, everyone she looks at seems like him,

Drunk.

Maybe she said yes and doesn’t remember, I mean look at him, star player, and he’s such a hunk.

She probably came onto him, since they were both drunk, gorgeous hockey player, every word just deepens her funk.

No one believes her, ‘its fine he was drunk’, as if that excuses his actions and abuses, of a passed out girl. What the fuck is this world.

This is an old slam I wrote ages ago. ✌🏼

C.C.

Fingers Crossed

I’ve got an audition tomorrow morning and currently getting over a cold so right now I need to just head to bed and pray to whatever powers may be that my throat heals up overnight along with this stuffed up nose.

I’ll let you all know how it went afterwards, it’s the first of two opportunities I’ve got over the next few days. Keep searching out how to open those doors people! Keep advancing! Everyday, even when you’re sick, you’re still advancing in life. Don’t let time spent become a regret, never stop moving, evolving.

Anyways keep it real and do your best to live in the moment, we’re all divine beings, we’ve got this!

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes all,

C.C.

I Missed A Flower

I missed a flower.

Not just any but the most

amazing and beautiful

Prettiest penny,

And by a penny I mean to say she’s tiny and finding her in your arms is considered lucky.

I like to think that you resemble a beautiful red rose,

That is to say I clutch you to my chest regardless of the thorns.

You don’t want to hurt me but your spikes keep my wound closed.

A nice dull ache as you’re rooted in ground, I prefer to endure this love loss I’ve found,

Rather than throw the pain away

I’ll keep it in my heart

And love for another day.

.

Than risk bleeding to death without you. Without new. I find flowers enhance their beauty as they slowly fade away.

Please don’t fade on me

But if you do, than that’s okay.

You’ve been rooted before and rooted you’ll stay, I know you’ll bloom again one day.

Even if it’s not for me, but that’s okay. As long as they love you.

.

Here’s once again a different emotion/flavour of poem, I’ll get back to posting more article type posts soon but for now people have been enjoying the poems so they shall continue to pop up!

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes,

C.C.

Somewhat Solutions To The Sad Times.

I try not to do straight up lists for blog posts because I feel like i’m cheating myself when I do, they just don’t take much effort and are almost a dime a dozen. However there are occasions where I feel the need to make one, one of those occasions being now. This list is a list of various things which cheer me up a tiny bit or at least help lessen the sadness. Sad times come to us all and it doesn’t make you weak for breaking down, it makes you human. Don’t be afraid to be sad, feel every emotion as fully as you can; they’re what makes this human experience so incredible. But also try not to lurk in the sadness for too long, anyways, here’s what I usually find helps for me.

Just plug in some earbuds and go for a walk. That’s it. Just find a nice chill soundtrack that you enjoy, and breath in that fresh air. Personally I recommend anything from stereotypical hippy music to lo-fi hip hop, one pretty much spreads infectious joy and the other is amazing for thinking through whatever’s aiding you from like a distant perspective. I also believe fresh air helps in most situations, a closer connection to the energy of the earth.

Take off your shoes. Just find a nice warm bit of dirt, rock, sandy beach, or maybe a nice sun spot in a mossy forest. Just being barefoot and having that connection to the earth always feels so incredibly soothing. Plus like my last point, it gets you outside into the fresh air!

Pull out your phone, think of your favourite two shows, type them into google looking for crossover fics that aren’t just lemons. Ever wanted to see Harry Potter as part of The Avengers? Maybe Walking Dead with the characters from The Office? Or if you really need something entertaining search for crack fics, which are basically just sheer nonsensory parodies of whatever that fic is based off of. A personal favourite of mine is The Champion’s Champion by DriftWood1965, it’s a story where Harry lets Ron stand in for him as the triwizard tournament champion and involves fart jokes, giant canaries, and potentially a fire breathing duck. Honestly I highly recommend it although do be aware that they bash on Ron a bit.

Go to BulkBarn and buy some candy! Sure it’s indulging the kid in you but come on, everyone’s got a little bit of a sweet tooth and honestly you probably deserve a treat. That’s this point, indulge yourself. So many times do we neglect ourselves just trying to look after everything around us, while that’s a good thing to do we really need to stop and take more time to look after ourselves. I don’t just mean your physical health but your mental health too, destress! Unplug yourself. Get in touch with even the littlest things that you used to really enjoy but somehow ended up not doing over the years and you don’t really recall when you stopped, just that the habit is dead. Reconnect with yourself.

Honestly peeps, just watch some really adorable cat or dog videos. Heck, cuddle with an actual live cat or dog, or a bird, lizard, snake, whatever types of creatures you find adorable. The point i’m trying to make is there’s so much heckin cuteness out there and we need to enjoy it a little bit more.

Try to astral project. Maybe you’ll manage it, maybe you won’t. But i’m fairly confident it would at least take your mind off of whatever is ailing you. At least for a little bit. Plus as a bonus I find going to bed directly after trying to astral project is simply amazing, as your body is already in such a relaxed and out of it state.

Watch some Youtube videos. Find channels like Dakota Wint’s Dakota Of Earth. Find videos that make you happy, amuse you, distract you, allow you to escape from your life for a little while. Whatever intrigues you can probably be found on youtube, although i’d also recommend looking for binaural beats and meditating while listening to them.

You could also come and read blogs like mine, I mean i’m not one hundred percent certain that i’ll cheer you up but I hope I can at least ease the pain and be a distraction from whatever troubles you. Feel free to poke around my different posts, might find something more to read! There’s not a huge amount right now but i’m building it up at a steady rate, haven’t missed a single day yet! Really hope I didn’t just jinx myself with that one but ah well. I know this wasn’t much so i’ll probably post more on the topic later but that’s all for now.

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes people,

C.C.

I’m a huge sucker for a good beachside firework show ~ C.C.

People Like Golden Retrievers.

Do you ever just have those people who can just smile at you and you’re instantly cheered up? Like their physical presence is so intoxicatingly happy that you just can’t feel bad around them? I think of those people like human golden retrievers; I absolutely love golden retrievers. They just radiate such a warm happy feeling that you just melt around them. Get more people like that in your life, they’ll only ever give you positive vibes. That’s the life tip for this week.

We don’t love enough. I mean oh sure we bandy the word about whenever we please, but not so often do we actually love. We’ve retreated from loving full heartedly because we learned of the pain which could come of it. That needs to change. Love wholeheartedly, love with every fiber of your being! Don’t be afraid of getting swept away, don’t you ever be afraid of love! Sometimes it hurts but don’t hide that pain, wear it openly. Live proudly. Revel in your pain when love leaves for it tells you you’re alive, if you feel everything fully than sure the lows hurt, but the highs? Simply nirvana, there’s so much beauty if you just let yourself fully feel.

I hate walking around everyday watching people, people with their heart’s blocked up behind a stone wall for fear of being touched. They’ll text lol but they’re not really laughing, they’ll rave about something being hilarious and then just do a half smile while watching it. People jumping from partner to partner not feeling the loss because they never allowed themselves to truly form a connection. I don’t understand that lifestyle. If something’s funny than let your amusement spill out, if it’s hysterically funny than cry tears of laughter, or giggle, snort! Don’t use people to cover up the emptiness of the one before them, don’t tell someone you love them while you’re holding your heart close. Learn to feel again, learn to living again!

If anyone was wondering, yes I may have been watching a bunch of Matthew Silver clips before this. But I mean how could you not love him and be influenced by his message? There’s just so much positive energy that comes off that man it’s incredible! And you can watch him slowly affect everyone using that infectious sense of fun, amusement, enjoyment. Even the people who had originally been staring with a disapproving and disgruntled expression get sucked into the “Love fart magic” as he calls it. I’d just leave it at love, he’s constantly spreading love vibes. It’s admirable.

Someone asked me what happiness was and I couldn’t really decide how to answer the question. I’m still not sure how to answer the question. However I will say that happiness is amazing, something to strive for. But that really doesn’t actually help to answer what happiness actually is. I was tempted to give the medical answer but I knew that wasn’t what he meant. I think if i’d known what to tell him I would’ve said happiness is that warm fuzzy feeling you get when a kitten chooses to curl up in your lap. I would’ve said happiness is the warm feeling of the sun on your face and a warm, gentle breeze hugging your skin. Happiness is waking up to the smell of your favourite food knowing it was cooked just for you. I would’ve said happiness was so many things, but all I said was “You know when someone’s face lights up at seeing you?” and then he walked off the subway. I hope he’s doing well, wherever he ended up.

Spread love, seek tranquility, speak peace,

C.C.

I spend too much time with my head in the clouds ~C.C.

An Odd Perspective.

Isn’t it weird knowing there’s people out there reading your words and opinions? I mean I get that’s how it usually is with social media posts but this just has a different feel, you know? I don’t usually do research for future social media posts either, as opposed to this. I remember, that one of my first posts had me mentioning that i’d talk about odd perspectives at some point. Well I feel like tonight/today is a day for one of those posts.

Have you ever stood on a street corner waiting for the lights, and become consciously aware of every single person around you? Followed by becoming insanely hyper focused on every single little movement your body makes but every movement feels wrong, even if you’re just standing there? It’s not a fun experience. I find social anxiety aided me in becoming really good at reading body language just so it could turn around to start misreading stuff whenever the anxiety hits.

Have you ever walked down to a huge exciting event all on your lonesome? Your whole world feels slightly muted, tilted. There’s a film over anything you hear somehow distancing it and the people pass by you in slow motion on their way to the spectacle. You arrive after following the families and teeming throngs of people just to wait around standing up, surrounded by random groups of people all talking to each other. This goes on for about twenty-eight minutes, some random dj no one has ever heard of does a short set. Making it through that and clapping politely even though you’re impatient for the main event. The fireworks go off. The sky is so beautiful, the world just falls away. Then it’s over. You’ve fallen back to earth with the other awakening people as the spell gets broken with lack of an encore. Everyone goes home. You go home. The families walk past and around you. You’re a solitary stranger in this sea of communities. You slip off to home, unsatisfied but in a way still content.

I love to watch the world wake up. Just sitting on your porch watching the sun rise, the gentle wind hugs your skin. You can see everything start to breathe, the birds begin to fly overhead. A solitary car speeds by, yet the world is still. It’s like a moving painting, or at the very least art. The rustle of leaves in a gentle gust of wind, the morning fog burning off as the sun continues to rise. The world turns gold and crimson, with just a dash of orange. Everything just feels so incredibly peaceful, you’re at one with the world. But at the same time it makes you feel like nothing is real. There are no people moving aside from the distant cars, it’s like being in a twilight zone which now that i’m thinking of it is probably part of where that movie got it’s name. I like plugging into the world that way, I always feel so refreshed afterwards regardless of usually having had to miss out on some sleep. It’s even better with a tea, beer, cider, or some sort of quiet smokable object. You don’t want to break the tranquil morning silence, and with a drink you can meditate on the warm feeling in you chest and the warmth from the sun on your face. Recharge your spirit.

Have you ever managed to separate yourself from that constantly talking voice in your head that we usually call our thoughts? If you try a little bit and meditate on forcing it to repeat a mantra, you’ll notice that you’re still observing. In that moment the thoughts almost feel separate from that greater sense of ‘you’. I’m not really sure what one would call that, it’s not an ego death but I guess in a way it’s an ego separation from your conscious thoughts? I’m not sure what it’s properly called but it’s an absolutely amazing experience. Feeling that divide, that autonomy it has. The way it twists and struggle to form itself into different words or thoughts than those of the mantra you’re making it repeat, you can feel it fighting you, almost as if it were alive. Which I mean technically it is because it’s part of you but dang it’s a pretty odd perspective that’s also really neat!

I wonder where we go when we zone out. Like those moments where you’re in a really long car ride so you just put in some earbuds and stare out the window listening to music until you arrive at your destination. It’s like your mind goes blank and you’re just out of it for the entire ride, in a trance. But definitely not asleep. Sometimes I like to think of that simulation theory, which basically says since everything is connected to our brains than what’s to say we’re not all just floating in some jar as just a blob of brain being fed information for a life. Moments like that are just holes in the matrix. Another neat theory is that you could be reliving every single moment of your life right now thinking it’s for the first time, hence why you might get deja vu sometimes. And by reliving I meant you’re dying and this is your life flashing before your eyes. It’s theorized that time would almost slow to a crawl as your brain tried it’s best to just relive everything in those few moments before the light fully leaves your eyes. It’s obvious that some of those more inconsequential moments would get fast forwarded in order to maximize whatever it deems important or a ‘core’ memory.

I think those are all of the odd perspective for now but I might make this a running thing. Maybe have one or two odd perspectives per week? I love odd perspectives, most of the time they’re just an amazingly artsy way of looking at the world. Always seek to look at the world through new eyes. There’s so much to see depending on where you look in from, so clear your mind, open your heart, and see. See those beautiful moments of tranquility that exist in daily life, seek them out, enjoy them to the fullest!

Spread the love, peace, and chill vibes,

C.C.