The Volcano

You tell me

Grown men don’t cry.

As a man I am not allowed to cry

As a man I am supposed to rage and shoot fire from my fingertips

And I do not want to relate to that.

I do not want to be the volcano

Smouldering red hot rage

Boiling up

And raining down from the heavens.

I am not the volcano.

And yet I can feel white

hot Molten rage

Flow through my veins

When I think of the way

You told me

Grown men don’t cry.

As if you’d prefer me to build it all up. Whole body shaking

Until cracks breach my skin

And with an almighty roar I fracture

warping everything around me.

Raining down death and destruction indiscriminately

Cause at least that way I’m not the only one who’s hurt.

You’d prefer the volcanic ashes of our love to fall down like feathers

Staining people’s skin with the stories of us. Burning the shadows of ourselves into all of the places we once lived and loved each other.

So that years later once everything has cooled and my heart has hardened up like magma

Others can come and admire the ghosts of our love.

I wonder, can they feel the fear of our final moments?

Moments before I proved you right.

That I was a volcano.

But you, you were the one that set me off. And now I don’t cry

Not because grown men don’t cry

But because the magma in my veins

Pumping through my heart

Has grown cold and hard in your absence.

I both fear and await the day my heart begins to heat back up.

C.C.

(I did mention I’d occasionally post my poetry)

Update

Hey all so I know I just made a post about how I’m always going to hold myself to posting every day but I went deaf in my right ear last night and spent the day trying to fix it, now I’m just hearing an echo from that ear but at least it’s an improvement from what it was.

I’ll make an actual post after I’ve got this sorted. Take care of yourselves out there.

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes all,

C.C.

Somewhat Solutions To The Sad Times.

I try not to do straight up lists for blog posts because I feel like i’m cheating myself when I do, they just don’t take much effort and are almost a dime a dozen. However there are occasions where I feel the need to make one, one of those occasions being now. This list is a list of various things which cheer me up a tiny bit or at least help lessen the sadness. Sad times come to us all and it doesn’t make you weak for breaking down, it makes you human. Don’t be afraid to be sad, feel every emotion as fully as you can; they’re what makes this human experience so incredible. But also try not to lurk in the sadness for too long, anyways, here’s what I usually find helps for me.

Just plug in some earbuds and go for a walk. That’s it. Just find a nice chill soundtrack that you enjoy, and breath in that fresh air. Personally I recommend anything from stereotypical hippy music to lo-fi hip hop, one pretty much spreads infectious joy and the other is amazing for thinking through whatever’s aiding you from like a distant perspective. I also believe fresh air helps in most situations, a closer connection to the energy of the earth.

Take off your shoes. Just find a nice warm bit of dirt, rock, sandy beach, or maybe a nice sun spot in a mossy forest. Just being barefoot and having that connection to the earth always feels so incredibly soothing. Plus like my last point, it gets you outside into the fresh air!

Pull out your phone, think of your favourite two shows, type them into google looking for crossover fics that aren’t just lemons. Ever wanted to see Harry Potter as part of The Avengers? Maybe Walking Dead with the characters from The Office? Or if you really need something entertaining search for crack fics, which are basically just sheer nonsensory parodies of whatever that fic is based off of. A personal favourite of mine is The Champion’s Champion by DriftWood1965, it’s a story where Harry lets Ron stand in for him as the triwizard tournament champion and involves fart jokes, giant canaries, and potentially a fire breathing duck. Honestly I highly recommend it although do be aware that they bash on Ron a bit.

Go to BulkBarn and buy some candy! Sure it’s indulging the kid in you but come on, everyone’s got a little bit of a sweet tooth and honestly you probably deserve a treat. That’s this point, indulge yourself. So many times do we neglect ourselves just trying to look after everything around us, while that’s a good thing to do we really need to stop and take more time to look after ourselves. I don’t just mean your physical health but your mental health too, destress! Unplug yourself. Get in touch with even the littlest things that you used to really enjoy but somehow ended up not doing over the years and you don’t really recall when you stopped, just that the habit is dead. Reconnect with yourself.

Honestly peeps, just watch some really adorable cat or dog videos. Heck, cuddle with an actual live cat or dog, or a bird, lizard, snake, whatever types of creatures you find adorable. The point i’m trying to make is there’s so much heckin cuteness out there and we need to enjoy it a little bit more.

Try to astral project. Maybe you’ll manage it, maybe you won’t. But i’m fairly confident it would at least take your mind off of whatever is ailing you. At least for a little bit. Plus as a bonus I find going to bed directly after trying to astral project is simply amazing, as your body is already in such a relaxed and out of it state.

Watch some Youtube videos. Find channels like Dakota Wint’s Dakota Of Earth. Find videos that make you happy, amuse you, distract you, allow you to escape from your life for a little while. Whatever intrigues you can probably be found on youtube, although i’d also recommend looking for binaural beats and meditating while listening to them.

You could also come and read blogs like mine, I mean i’m not one hundred percent certain that i’ll cheer you up but I hope I can at least ease the pain and be a distraction from whatever troubles you. Feel free to poke around my different posts, might find something more to read! There’s not a huge amount right now but i’m building it up at a steady rate, haven’t missed a single day yet! Really hope I didn’t just jinx myself with that one but ah well. I know this wasn’t much so i’ll probably post more on the topic later but that’s all for now.

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes people,

C.C.

I’m a huge sucker for a good beachside firework show ~ C.C.

People Like Golden Retrievers.

Do you ever just have those people who can just smile at you and you’re instantly cheered up? Like their physical presence is so intoxicatingly happy that you just can’t feel bad around them? I think of those people like human golden retrievers; I absolutely love golden retrievers. They just radiate such a warm happy feeling that you just melt around them. Get more people like that in your life, they’ll only ever give you positive vibes. That’s the life tip for this week.

We don’t love enough. I mean oh sure we bandy the word about whenever we please, but not so often do we actually love. We’ve retreated from loving full heartedly because we learned of the pain which could come of it. That needs to change. Love wholeheartedly, love with every fiber of your being! Don’t be afraid of getting swept away, don’t you ever be afraid of love! Sometimes it hurts but don’t hide that pain, wear it openly. Live proudly. Revel in your pain when love leaves for it tells you you’re alive, if you feel everything fully than sure the lows hurt, but the highs? Simply nirvana, there’s so much beauty if you just let yourself fully feel.

I hate walking around everyday watching people, people with their heart’s blocked up behind a stone wall for fear of being touched. They’ll text lol but they’re not really laughing, they’ll rave about something being hilarious and then just do a half smile while watching it. People jumping from partner to partner not feeling the loss because they never allowed themselves to truly form a connection. I don’t understand that lifestyle. If something’s funny than let your amusement spill out, if it’s hysterically funny than cry tears of laughter, or giggle, snort! Don’t use people to cover up the emptiness of the one before them, don’t tell someone you love them while you’re holding your heart close. Learn to feel again, learn to living again!

If anyone was wondering, yes I may have been watching a bunch of Matthew Silver clips before this. But I mean how could you not love him and be influenced by his message? There’s just so much positive energy that comes off that man it’s incredible! And you can watch him slowly affect everyone using that infectious sense of fun, amusement, enjoyment. Even the people who had originally been staring with a disapproving and disgruntled expression get sucked into the “Love fart magic” as he calls it. I’d just leave it at love, he’s constantly spreading love vibes. It’s admirable.

Someone asked me what happiness was and I couldn’t really decide how to answer the question. I’m still not sure how to answer the question. However I will say that happiness is amazing, something to strive for. But that really doesn’t actually help to answer what happiness actually is. I was tempted to give the medical answer but I knew that wasn’t what he meant. I think if i’d known what to tell him I would’ve said happiness is that warm fuzzy feeling you get when a kitten chooses to curl up in your lap. I would’ve said happiness is the warm feeling of the sun on your face and a warm, gentle breeze hugging your skin. Happiness is waking up to the smell of your favourite food knowing it was cooked just for you. I would’ve said happiness was so many things, but all I said was “You know when someone’s face lights up at seeing you?” and then he walked off the subway. I hope he’s doing well, wherever he ended up.

Spread love, seek tranquility, speak peace,

C.C.

I spend too much time with my head in the clouds ~C.C.

An Odd Perspective.

Isn’t it weird knowing there’s people out there reading your words and opinions? I mean I get that’s how it usually is with social media posts but this just has a different feel, you know? I don’t usually do research for future social media posts either, as opposed to this. I remember, that one of my first posts had me mentioning that i’d talk about odd perspectives at some point. Well I feel like tonight/today is a day for one of those posts.

Have you ever stood on a street corner waiting for the lights, and become consciously aware of every single person around you? Followed by becoming insanely hyper focused on every single little movement your body makes but every movement feels wrong, even if you’re just standing there? It’s not a fun experience. I find social anxiety aided me in becoming really good at reading body language just so it could turn around to start misreading stuff whenever the anxiety hits.

Have you ever walked down to a huge exciting event all on your lonesome? Your whole world feels slightly muted, tilted. There’s a film over anything you hear somehow distancing it and the people pass by you in slow motion on their way to the spectacle. You arrive after following the families and teeming throngs of people just to wait around standing up, surrounded by random groups of people all talking to each other. This goes on for about twenty-eight minutes, some random dj no one has ever heard of does a short set. Making it through that and clapping politely even though you’re impatient for the main event. The fireworks go off. The sky is so beautiful, the world just falls away. Then it’s over. You’ve fallen back to earth with the other awakening people as the spell gets broken with lack of an encore. Everyone goes home. You go home. The families walk past and around you. You’re a solitary stranger in this sea of communities. You slip off to home, unsatisfied but in a way still content.

I love to watch the world wake up. Just sitting on your porch watching the sun rise, the gentle wind hugs your skin. You can see everything start to breathe, the birds begin to fly overhead. A solitary car speeds by, yet the world is still. It’s like a moving painting, or at the very least art. The rustle of leaves in a gentle gust of wind, the morning fog burning off as the sun continues to rise. The world turns gold and crimson, with just a dash of orange. Everything just feels so incredibly peaceful, you’re at one with the world. But at the same time it makes you feel like nothing is real. There are no people moving aside from the distant cars, it’s like being in a twilight zone which now that i’m thinking of it is probably part of where that movie got it’s name. I like plugging into the world that way, I always feel so refreshed afterwards regardless of usually having had to miss out on some sleep. It’s even better with a tea, beer, cider, or some sort of quiet smokable object. You don’t want to break the tranquil morning silence, and with a drink you can meditate on the warm feeling in you chest and the warmth from the sun on your face. Recharge your spirit.

Have you ever managed to separate yourself from that constantly talking voice in your head that we usually call our thoughts? If you try a little bit and meditate on forcing it to repeat a mantra, you’ll notice that you’re still observing. In that moment the thoughts almost feel separate from that greater sense of ‘you’. I’m not really sure what one would call that, it’s not an ego death but I guess in a way it’s an ego separation from your conscious thoughts? I’m not sure what it’s properly called but it’s an absolutely amazing experience. Feeling that divide, that autonomy it has. The way it twists and struggle to form itself into different words or thoughts than those of the mantra you’re making it repeat, you can feel it fighting you, almost as if it were alive. Which I mean technically it is because it’s part of you but dang it’s a pretty odd perspective that’s also really neat!

I wonder where we go when we zone out. Like those moments where you’re in a really long car ride so you just put in some earbuds and stare out the window listening to music until you arrive at your destination. It’s like your mind goes blank and you’re just out of it for the entire ride, in a trance. But definitely not asleep. Sometimes I like to think of that simulation theory, which basically says since everything is connected to our brains than what’s to say we’re not all just floating in some jar as just a blob of brain being fed information for a life. Moments like that are just holes in the matrix. Another neat theory is that you could be reliving every single moment of your life right now thinking it’s for the first time, hence why you might get deja vu sometimes. And by reliving I meant you’re dying and this is your life flashing before your eyes. It’s theorized that time would almost slow to a crawl as your brain tried it’s best to just relive everything in those few moments before the light fully leaves your eyes. It’s obvious that some of those more inconsequential moments would get fast forwarded in order to maximize whatever it deems important or a ‘core’ memory.

I think those are all of the odd perspective for now but I might make this a running thing. Maybe have one or two odd perspectives per week? I love odd perspectives, most of the time they’re just an amazingly artsy way of looking at the world. Always seek to look at the world through new eyes. There’s so much to see depending on where you look in from, so clear your mind, open your heart, and see. See those beautiful moments of tranquility that exist in daily life, seek them out, enjoy them to the fullest!

Spread the love, peace, and chill vibes,

C.C.

Exhausted Update

What do you do on the days where you can’t drag yourself out of bed? Personally I enjoy curling up with a nice book and some tea, at least most days. Others I prefer just putting on some earbuds and losing myself in the music, everything else becomes so trivial as you drift away. I really wanted to write a blog post today so I wouldn’t kill my daily posting streak but I really wasn’t in the mood. I woke up super late feeling groggy, had a headache for pretty much the entire day, and then just felt out of it all evening. I guess it would be a pretty smart idea to write up a surplus of articles so I’ve got some content to post on my off-days and I’m not always scrambling to make a good post on my usual schedule, especially because I would love the occasional off day. Although I know I should just be writing everyday for the practice, for practice makes perfect!

I honestly can’t think of anything else to write right now, I may just leave this post here as a placeholder and promise to myself that I’ll write up multiple articles tomorrow in order to make up for today’s. I’m trying to get this post done but my keyboard is blurring along with the screen and my whole body feels heavy, or in other words I’m exhausted. Tomorrow you can expect the same routine to start back up again, I just needed a break according to my body. I’m going to end this one here since I don’t want to start sleepily rambling off into tangents, but I hope all is well with all of you! As for me, it’s time to fluff up a pillow and finally sleep.

Peace, love, and some sleepy tranquil vibes,

C.C.

Deepening Or Branching?

It’s kind of odd seeing all the new blog hate posts. Well I guess I wouldn’t call them hate posts but they all seem to be actively discouraging people from making blogs unless you can offer a service or affiliate marketing. Even then they all casually talk about having a couple hundred followers in order to do that.. How do they expect people to get up to a few hundred followers without learning from failure? Everything goes “Use perfect grammar, attract clients by turning yourself into a minor authority on a topic, find a popular niche and model yourself after that. Well sure you can generate a following that way but at that point you’re no longer really blogging are you? You’re just turning yourself into a business clone.

I don’t want to ever forget where i’ve come from. So many blogs seem to evolve into such large consumer fed constructs and lose the voice of the author which originally attracted people to the blog, I don’t want to become just another toneless voice on the internet. Another one of those blog owners who lurk in the comments of similar blogs in order to learn how to connect into that source or readers by seeing which of that blog’s posts generated the most traffic over the past couple of months. From their they usually go into guest posting on that blog in order to siphon traffic to their own blog. Now i’m not saying that all guest posting is evil or has an underhanded intent as it can sometimes be as simple as two collaborators deciding to help each other out.

Being perfectly honest ‘guest posting’ does somewhat intrigue me do to it’s potential to grow an audience, plus it’s been used to great success by a lot of big name blogs out there. I just feel that it would be rather impudent to the owner of that blog, regardless i’m sure i’ll get over some of my moral compunctions regarding the issue over time.

Anyways i’ve now started reaching a point where i’m going to need to decide if I should slightly branch out what I post about or if it would make more sense to just dive deeper into what I seem to have made as my core topic, any thoughts? Since I like to add an aspect of tranquility when I can, I was thinking of doing some posts on the effects of loneliness and self isolation. Specifically how one’s mindset and the thoughts they view of as normal begin to change over prolonged isolation, how one’s priorities and concerns seem to slightly shift. I’d also like to get into talking about some heavy topics such as social anxiety, depression, and eating disorders seeing as both have had quite a prevalent effect on my life. All of which I have experience with personally through both myself and with those who I hold dear.

Originally today I had planned to write something about why there’s so much dislike for hosting ads on your blog but I started to somewhat see what everyone’s point was so I became uncertain of the tone I wanted the post to have. The main concerns seem to be that ads take people away from your page, add extra loading time for when people are attempting to view the site, and that you have no control over what the ads are showing people so your post/site could end up advertising products or services of which you’d really rather not be associated with. Each and every one of those seems like a good reason to me however like I said earlier in this post I don’t understand why new bloggers aren’t encouraged to experiment for themselves. Why aren’t we left to learn to grow from our failures, especially with all of these options built into the site? Hence why i’ve currently got ads enabled.

I’m probably going to disable the ads after some time since I don’t really like all of the clauses within the ad hosting agreement, especially the one’s where they can enact a penalty if you post or talk about something they disagree with. I mean i’m not currently planning to post anything with ‘Any content that is inappropriate or not “family safe”.’ however what constitutes inappropriate is apparently decided upon at their discretion. I don’t enjoy the thought of just laying every post at their mercy. They also have control over anything ‘unlawful or promotes unlawful activity’ now i’m not planning to set out to violate laws with posts but being a Canadian citizen rather than U.S. citizen there’s almost certainly a few discrepancies in our laws that i’m unaware of. One of the biggest examples I can think of is what if I decided to make a post about the benefits of CBD which is one of the chemical compounds in marijuana? Marijuana is legal here in Canada however i’m not sure if every state has legalized it yet in the U.S. which could potentially make any posts about it “unlawful”.

I should probably specify that at the moment i’m not currently planning to post about anything marijuana related but there are a ton of benefits from it and ways it could be applied to meditation. Heck there’s even history of it already being strongly prevalent among spiritual groups as a way of communing with the divine/your higher self/the collective consciousness. There’s even a ton of recorded medical benefits aside from the spiritual ones. Huh, maybe I will end up posting about it after doing more research on whether it would be permitted or not. Anyways if you made it all the way to the bottom of this train-wreck of a post than I both thank and congratulate you. I was a bit distracted yesterday leading to such a long pause between posts resulting in things being a bit unstructured, or at least more so than usually. Soon i’ll be back to turning this blog into a nice tranquil refuge from your daily lives, I hope to see you join me on this journey. ^-^

As always dear readers, peace, love, and tranquil vibes,

C.C.

In the words of Peep “Ash Is Our Purest Form”

So Much Out There!

Do you ever find yourself trying to learn a new language just because you researched a place and decided to go there? Like completely spur of the moment and then two days later you’ve learned an entire new alphabet? Cause same. Except my only problem is I keep getting interested in new places, languages, and people. There’s just so much out there! How are people possibly content just living in the same place for their entire lives? I don’t understand it! I really want to travel more and experience as much of this beautiful world as I can, there’s just so much to see. Not only that, but there’s so much to hear! All it takes to learn a new language is some time, dedication, and an internet connection.

Currently i’m being a bit overambitious and attempting to learn Hindi and Japanese along with polishing off my French which i’d say i’m adequate at. Not amazing but adequate, my biggest problem is I keep swapping languages. Japanese has three alphabets, hindi has one, and then french is similar but still different with their alphabet, so understandably it gets a bit confusing at times. Regardless, i’m still steadily making progress with each language! I usually use Duolingo because of their companion flashcard app but you can also listen to podcasts, watch lessons, google books in other languages or movies, all you need to do is just keep exposing yourself to the languages you want to learn, give yourself time to work through all the dry bits, and then start having conversations with people who speak the language; works especially well if you’re in the country of that language so you’re hearing it everywhere, everyday!

There’s plenty of reasons to learn a new language if you aren’t currently working on one. Primarily being you’ll develop the ability to watch media in that language. You can read it’s books, watch it’s movies, tv shows, plays, understand the music! Plus you’ll become exposed to a whole new culture! There’s so many different ways of life in this world and we all get so focused on the ways within our country’s borders. Especially recently, how much of the hate in this world would disappear if we all just took a moment to learn about the culture of our neighbours? I’m not saying learn to just love everyone as I feel there always needs to be a balance of light and dark in this world, but if we just understood each other? That would be the most beautiful day in existence, I hope to live long enough for us all to at least get a glimpse of an understanding. A glimpse is all I ask. Can you picture it?

Peace, love, and tranquil vibes people,

C.C.

Europe Is So Incredibly Beautiful ^-^

Mindset Metamorphosis.

You ever wake up one day and just decide that you’re going to become a new person? Like you came to a realization about your usual habits and behaviour that you weren’t too enthused with, so you just consciously decided to change? And then you find out it’s a lot more difficult than you thought it would be when the idea first jumped inside your head and you’re not sure you’ve got what it takes to truly follow through with that shift from the norm? Me too, well in a way. I recently came to the realization that I was stagnating. I enjoy laying around relaxing, playing video games, reading, procrastinating on actual important things. In school I would always leave assignments until the eleventh hour which somehow ended up infecting other parts of my life to the point where I was constantly aware of things like bills, my dwindling bank account, soon to expire licences which I could’ve renewed online if i’d been proactive, etc. To sum it up I was basically sitting on a track watching a train come at me while pondering over the best course of action, and then sidetracking myself from thinking about that action resulting in doing absolutely nothing until it was either move or get hit by the train.

So I eventually decided to quit deliberating and actually do something. Sure my usual extracurricular were fun but if i’m being blatantly honest with myself than they’re all various forms of escapism which I was using to distract myself from having to make major decisions or listen to the thoughts going through my own head. This had to stop. I was at a point in my life where the sheer number of pathways I could now take having graduated college was so overwhelming in number that I locked up and couldn’t seem to follow any of them. All I was doing was retreating to my books day after day, to social media, to Netflix, etc. I was aware that I was simply letting everything pile up as my bank account drained itself drier and drier, so then came the question; what was I going to do now? I couldn’t very well just continue spinning my wheels in place.

So I got up, I took a shower, ate some food, and started thinking. What was I good at? How could I begin doing something productive with my life without confining myself to a cubicle or taking up a nine to five job? I thought long and hard into the night making a list of all sorts of potential avenues for me to take before I finally came to another realization. This brainstorming was all well and good but it wouldn’t actually accomplish anything. I was just on the edge of falling into a pattern of formulating hypothetical jobs/pathways throughout life, planning them all out from step one to thirty five, and then..nothing. I would have nothing to show for the time spent if I never actually went and physically followed up on step one. So I did. Then I took another step, and another. Soon enough I found myself laying the groundwork for future success, but then I started thinking and second guessing. I began undermining my own abilities in comparison to others, which brought me to my third realization.

In this world the one person you should never underestimate is yourself. You’re capable of more than you could possibly have imagined so don’t doubt yourself, don’t doubt your abilities. Why would any other person who underwent the same or similar training to you deserve a higher place in your mind? Why get into that mentality of, “I’m still new at this, they’ll probably beat me for this position, I bet they’re way more qualified.” cause maybe they are maybe they aren’t. Chances are you’re just as qualified as that stranger, you’ve taken steps to get there today just like they did. Anyways the more I started trying to make that my mindset the more things seem to work out, in part i’d attribute that to other people subconsciously noticing the confidence/self-assuredness I began projecting. But also in part to ‘The Law Of Attraction’ which when you take out most of the technical terms equates to the universe will attempt to create/provide for you those things of which your thoughts are focused on. You could also just say if you truly want it and work for it, one day chances are you’ll get it.

So I began chasing it. Day by day I began working after my dreams, putting myself out there, talking to people, making connections. This blog stemmed from my habit of reverting to escapism in my spare time, after doing it for such a long time the sudden life shift has been a hard thing to keep ahold of. Especially when I love each of the things I used as escapism, now i’ve most certainly not quit reading and the like but I began restricting myself to a certain amount of time for it each day. During that newly freed up block of time every day I began writing. At first just out of boredom if i’m being perfectly honest but it very quickly transformed into a genuine interest and enjoyment in writing. That enjoyment soon turned into a bit of a feedback loop, I would have some fun writing out some sort of post, receive likes and comments, and with each and every like or comment I became compelled to write even more.

Eventually though I decided that I wanted a place where I could truly write, not just social media sites or writing contests. I wanted the ability to grow a blog and format it however I wished. Something that could transform my writing from being just another time filling pastime to a viable use of time. I like to think this is a viable use of my time. Maybe I won’t ever get anywhere with this blog, maybe I will. Regardless I don’t think I would’ve been able to forgive myself had I left this as a ‘what if?’ rather than following through with it as I did. How many times in your life have you had the question of ‘What if?’, how many times have you tried something new only to fail but still be glad you tried? For me the answer is “not enough.” and that is something I sorely feel needs rectifying.

Dream loudly, live peacefully, and spread those loving tranquil vibes,

C.C.

The Restless Mind.

How do you all spend your time when you can’t sleep? For most of my life i’ve been an insomniac and having grown up in a family which was very homeopathic in it’s remedies I often find myself just accepting the wakefulness and finding ways to occupy my time. I also absolutely hate the feeling of swallowing pills or even just using a pharmaceutical remedy for something so small such as the inability to fall asleep when I know it’ll remedy itself once my body reaches the point of being so exhausted it just passes out. I’m aware that’s not the most healthy thing to do but i’ve become used to it. Anyways what remedies do you usually employ when you’re struck by a sense of restfulness and the kingdom of sleep eludes you?

Now having decided to avoid the pharmaceutical route I ended up scouring the net for a variety of different ways and well, most were unsuccessful there were a few I found merit in. That age old counting sheep trick has never once worked, actually now that I think about it i’m not sure I even know anyone that it’s worked for, huh.. Kind of odd. Well moving on, one of the most effective ones I found was surprisingly a focus exercise. All you need to do is get in the position you usually find most comfortable for sleep and get all your blankets nicely positioned, now visualize a candle surrounded by shadow. What you’re going to do is try to synch the flickering of the flame with your breathing, feel the shadows grow stronger every time the candle flickers, slowly over time the idea is to diminish the light your candle gives off until eventually it winks out and the darkness reigns supreme. By the time you’re swallowed by the darkness you should be asleep, or at least that’s the idea. This one while being more successful than the others is still rather unreliable; however i’ve found most sleep techniques to be unreliable so that’s not saying much.

A great one that I stumbled across which I pretty much always employ even when sleep hasn’t been eluding me is to lower your room temperature, which in most parts of the year translates to sleep with an open window. Not only does it seem to improve quality of sleep but that fresh air is really noticeable especially if you live with other people, in which case it’ll probably make your room smell better then theirs. It may not actually smell better or that different, but the comparison between the stale air from most of the house to the fresh air you let in from outside will most certainly be noticeable. In college I was often told I had the best smelling room in the house even though fresh air was pretty much my main secret for that…well okay that and an essential oil diffuser but regardless that natural air makes a difference!

I often came across sites screaming that if you used the “4-7-8” breathing method than you could learn to always fall asleep in under a minute. Puh-lease, maybe that trick works for some people but I barely noticed it having any effect. I will recognize though that if your problem is that you can’t seem to relax before bed than this may actually help you. Maybe. It gets you to place your tongue behind your front top teeth and exhale enough that you make a ‘whooshing’ sound, inhale through your nose to a count a four before holding it for a count of seven, then exhale for eight seconds through your mouth making that noise from before, essentially you’ve now done the technique and you’re just supposed to rinse and repeat until it works. Personally i’d say if you already have the control over your emotions to maintain a relaxed/calm state of mind then this will probably do absolutely nothing for you.

Yoga and meditation are both extremely useful for calming your mind and working through a bit of your excess energy so that you can just crawl under your covers before succumbing to sleep, although other times I find meditation will keep you awake so it can be kind of hard to find the correct balance. Also a lot of people tell you to avoid looking at your clock as it can give you anxiety over your sleeplessness, while in some cases this may be true it really doesn’t matter too much if you can lower the importance of time in your mind. Accept that sleep will come when it comes or it simply won’t, any stressing done over it will simply keep you up longer so release time of it’s importance. After that looking at the clock doesn’t really matter, but you also won’t be inclined to look at the clock for the same aforementioned reason.

My personal favourite activity for getting to sleep when it’s eluding you is to go through your usual nightly routine, get all curled up in bed, and then begin to read. Try and pick something that interests you but not to the point of interest that you’ll keep yourself up until dawn trying to finish it. If you’re like me and speed read everything try and slow that process down, really savour each and every word you can allowing (over time) that drowsiness to settle in. Eventually you’ll probably reach a point where you’re ready for sleep, give into that drowsiness and let yourself drift off. Especially because if you power through that drowsiness you’re likely to read until morning utilizing a fresh wave of energy and that’s really not what you wanted from this. Now while this is certainly a personal favourite and one I almost always employ, you should be aware that it can be a long time before that drowsiness sets in, sometimes even two to three hours. Even then its not assured.

Of course there is one technique which almost always cuts right through my insomnia letting me sleep, sleeping with someone else. Now i’m not saying that in the more lewd expression of the phrase although that would most certainly tire you out, but in the more innocent but still physical way. Cuddle up with someone. I’m not sure about the exact science to it but this will almost always work for me, it’s warm, cozy, comfortable, safe. You can zone out to the hypnotic rhythm of their breathing or the beating of their heart. Some part of me always realizes that I could wake them up through tossing and turning so i’ll try to remain still as much as I can and usually that stillness transforms into unconsciousness. I’ve never had the chance to find out aside from once when I passed out on a couch cuddling with a cat, but i’m fairly certain that the presence of an animal also has the same effect to a certain extent.

I didn’t mean to wait so long in the day to make this post but sleep was proving rather elusive last night so my schedule is a bit off. However i’m certainly going to try my best not to get too far off schedule with this blog, currently i’m trying to post on the daily with the occasional day having multiple posts but we’ll see how that changes with time. I want to keep doing daily posts, and I will but i’m going to keep an eye on how things go for the few first weeks so I can try to avoid burning myself out. If anyone has any suggestions on how they keep themselves from running out of things to post about while staying within a niche, than I would love to hear them. I mean i’ve got some ideas for how things are going to go but it’s always nice hearing about the process of others.

Peace, love, and tranquility,

C.C.

“Every morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.” ~ Buddha